an excerpt

i want to feel warranted for feeling the way i do. yet, from you i get nothing. but i'm giving myself the authority to feel regardless of expectations, rhyme or reason. for what it's worth you turned my gaze. it's not your fault that you don't know the enormity of doing so. you don't really know me or the ways in which i erect walls and tend to push rather than pull. yet, you know me. solely by observation, reading body language and tone of voice. so as much as you don't know my story, almost hoping to understand me rather than the bags i carry, you have intrigued me by the way in which you approach me with little fragility. you will not let me wear my 'handle with care' badge across my chest, because doing so would define me in ways that you don't see me. never have i felt so transparent. never have i felt so opaque.
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